A commentary on the 2019 Book of Common Prayer’s service for the “Reconciliation of Penitents”.
First, you enter. You have been waited upon. You are welcome in this space, have a seat.
Idly do people talk about “leaving the world at the door.” That is not true here. Bring the world with you —your cares, problems, stresses, sins, failures, collapsing dreams, the smell of where you just were, the thoughts which occupied you from your car to this little room, the screaming of children (yours or someone else’s), and the million things you need to do when you leave here —all of that bring with you. Leave none of it out.
The shadow of the cross is large enough to encompass all that spills-in with you as you arrive, with room for more. Enter the shadow of Golgotha’s Tree of Life and be at peace. This is the place for messes.
The Penitent, the person coming for confession, begins, “Bless me, for I have sinned.”
You begin freely at your own leisure. You invoke the blessing and the promise. You are no passive recipient of the shriving, you are an active participant. Your Lord has invited you and welcomed you. He has died so that you can have life and the forgiveness of sins. Don’t shrink back! Boldly approach the throne of grace (Heb. 4:16).
The Priest says “The Lord be in your heart and upon your lips that you may truly and humbly confess your sins: In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.”
We are so false, it is hard to be honest even to ourselves, even behind closed doors, even in the secret place, even under clergy-communicant privilege. We need the work of the Holy Spirit to do for us what we can not do by ourselves, to bring truth and humility and contrition.
The Penitent continues:
“I confess to Almighty God, to his Church, and to you, that I have sinned by my own fault in thought, word, and deed, in things done and left undone; especially __________. For these and all other sins that I cannot now remember, I am truly sorry. I pray God to have mercy on me. I firmly intend amendment of life, and I humbly beg forgiveness of God and his Church, and ask you for counsel, direction, and absolution.”
Here are two gifts: Firstly we need not over-prepare. A form is given to us. “I’m worried that I won’t know what to say” is a concern I hear often, as well as “What if I say the wrong thing?” All those concerns can be shut-up now. Here are the Church’s words.
Secondly we are given freedom. In that blank space you name the things in particular that your conscience demands you must. You are free here to do as you feel led. What keeps you awake at night? What do you fear for others to find-out? What is the darkest thing you think will make those who know it, if they ever told, forsake and leave you? What is the subject of your conversation with the Throne on Judgement Day? What is eating you? What have you done? Name it. The sons and daughters of Adam and Eve cannot name the animals until we are able to name our sins.
Be as specific as possible. Guilt is specific. The freedom from shame we find in forgiveness is specific too.
Forget something? That’s okay, there’s provision for that “all other sins that I cannot now remember…”
Here the Priest may offer counsel, direction, and comfort.
The Holy Spirit is at work in the moment in the ministers he has called to the service of the church. The Priest may read from Scripture, offer prayer, speak prophetically into the Penitent’s life, rebuke or admonish the Penitent, give counsel, arrange counseling, encourage certain courses of action, prescribe habits or actions (like giving the stolen thing back or deleting certain apps from one’s phone).
There may be laughter or tears. There may be lots of words or very few. The service may end here if, in the Priest’s mind there are outstanding thing which must be done before the absolution —there are moments where one must “leave the sacrifice burning on the altar and make peace first” (Matt. 5:23-24). These can be tender moments, and they can be severe.
Often these moments feel a little bit like you are dying on the inside. And you feel that way because you are.
The Priest then declares:
“Our Lord Jesus Christ, who has given power to his Church to absolve all sinners who truly repent and believe in him, of his great mercy forgive you all your offenses; and by his authority committed to me, I absolve you from all your sins: In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.”
Like marriage, where it is not the minister who does the marrying, so also in confession it is not the minister who does the forgiving but the Lord. The Priest has been charged and deputized to administer the forgiveness of the risen Lord Jesus (Jn. 20:23).
The Priest then joyously and seriously declares the good news: “The Lord has put away all your sins.”
And the Penitent rightly responds with the words: “Thanks be to God.”
No lavish promises, no bartering with God that if He forgives you that you’ll never do “X” again, no self-hating litany of how unworthy you are, a true and humble thanksgiving to a Good God. What is the response of true forgiveness? Thankfulness. Go and sin no more (Jn. 8:11).
The Priest continues with a prayer of blessing:
“O most loving Father, by your mercy you put away the sins of those who truly repent, and remember their sins no more. Restore and renew in your servant whatever has been corrupted by the fraud and malice of the devil, or by his/her own selfish will and weakness. Preserve and protect him/her within the fellowship of the Church; hear his/her prayers and relieve his/her pain; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.”
Not all of our troubles are our fault, some come from the fraud and malice of others. This prayer moves in the Spirit from thanksgiving to supplication, asking the Lord to guard and defend the Penitent from both their own sin and weakness as well as from attacks and assaults from enemies.
The Priest concludes: “Go in peace, and pray for me, a sinner.”
We’re not pretending here. The Priest is also, like the Penitent, a redeemed sinner saved by grace in whom Christ is being conformed and glorified. The Priest too needs prayer as he grows in true love and penitence. Just as the rest of the service is meant really and truly so also the Preist’s request should be understood to be real and true. Pray for your priests, they too are sinners like you.
You are sent with the same words of the Gospel commission: “Go!” (Matt. 28:19-20). Confession should always send us out into the world in the Power of the Spirit on the mission of Jesus. If His love is strong enough to forgive and heal and miserable sinner like you, then His Love is strong enough for the miserable and sinful folks around you —tell them the good news! You have been forgiven much, now go and love much (Lk. 7:47)!